If we are honest with ourselves going to confession is not something that we ‘enjoy.’ Why is this? The answer is probably something along the lines of ‘none of us likes to admit that we have done anything wrong.’ Those of you who have small children will see this played out many times as you ask them who has done this or that and they hang their heads in shame and tell you that it wasn’t them!!!
Preparing to go to confession helps us to take an honest look at our lives and our relationship with God and our relationships with others. We can then come before God the Father of Mercies to admit to Him and ourselves that there are areas in our lives that are not as they should be. Going to confession is a sign that we want to be better, that we want to change.
Our Holy Father, Pope Francis has given us encouragement in this area of our spiritual lives by preaching about confession and by going to confession himself. As he has said on many occasions ‘we are all sinners—even the Pope needs to go to confession.’
Do not be afraid of going to confession. You will meet the priest there, but more importantly you will meet Jesus who wishes to share with you His mercy, His forgiveness and His love.
As we prepare for confession we must:
- Examine our conscience
- Be sincerely sorry for our sins
- Confess our sins
- Resolve to amend our life
- After our confession, do the penance the priest assigns.
An Examination of Conscience
You shall love the Lord you God with all your heart.
Have I ignored God or excluded Him from my life and works?
Have been loyal to the Teaching Authority of the Church and been willing to profess my faith in public as well as in private?
Is my daily prayer a real conversation with God in mind and heart?
Have I put my trust in superstitions or involved myself in the Occult or Satanism?
Have I a true reverence and love for the name of God or have I offended Him through blasphemy, cursing or perjury?
Did I miss Mass on Sunday or Holyday of Obligation through my own fault?
Did I fulfil my Easter duties?
Have made a dishonest Confession in the past?
You shall love your neighbour as yourself.
Have I been disobedient, rude or disloyal to my parents or lawful superiors?
Have been harsh or overbearing to those under my authority?
Have I neglected my duty to provide a religious education for my children and to help them to know and love their faith?
Have I been impatient, angry, proud, jealous or hateful to others?
Did l get drunk, use drugs, give a bad example or scandal?
Have I been involved in vandalism; driven recklessly or injured anyone?
Did I in any way co-operate in an abortion?
Have I been lazy at my work, in study, or in the home?
Have I been immodest or impure by myself or with others?
Have I placed myself in occasions of sin, by reading, listening to, or looking at what was indecent, or pornographic?
Have failed to show love, understanding and respect to my marriage partner or been careless about my marriage vows?
Have I used forms of birth control forbidden by the Church?
Have I been guilty of cheating, theft, or gambling rashly?
Have I received stolen goods? Have I made restitution?
Do I give a full day’s work in return for a full day’s pay?
Do I pay a full day’s wage to those who work for me?
Have I told lies to injure anyone or excuse myself?
Have I been considerate, kind and generous to others in thought or deed?
Have I given way to self pity, brooded over injuries or refused to forgive?
Procedure in Confession
Begin by saying:
In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit.
Bless me, Father for I have sinned it is – [a week, or a month, a long time] since my last confession.
Then tell your sins to the priest. If you get stuck do not worry. Ask the priest to help you. When you have finished confessing your sins you should say:
I am sorry for all these sins and the those I cannot now remember.’
Then wait while the Priest gives any necessary advice, and assigns the penance.
Then make an Act of Contrition:
O my God, because you are so good I am very sorry that I have sinned against You and with the help of Your grace I will not sin again.
The Priest then gives you absolution:
God, the Father of mercies, through the death and resurrection of his Son has reconciled the world to himself and sent the Holy Spirit among us for the forgiveness of sins, through the ministry of the Church may God give you pardon and peace, and I absolve you from your sins in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Amen.’
Things to Remember
- Develop the habit of examining your conscience every day. It is then easier to recall sins committed.
- If it is a long time since your last confession or you unsure what to do ask the priest to help you
- Don’t postpone your confession. That never solves anything.
- Try to go to confession frequently at least once a month, to offer to God your love in spite of failure and receive both His forgiveness and His strength to overcome your faults and future temptations.
- Sin is any wilful thought, desire, word, action or omission forbidden by the law of God.
- We are bound to confess to a priest each and every serious sin (commonly called mortal) of which we are aware, in order to receive forgiveness. – This is the firm teaching of the Church, founded on the law of a good and loving God.
‘It is here in the sacrament of Penance that God’s mercy will at last win the victory over human wickedness. It is here that men will be cleansed of their sins and reconciled to God. We condemn the theory that the frequent confession of venial sins is ‘not a practice to be greatly valued.’ On the contrary, for a constant and rapid advancement in virtue, we highly recommend the pious practice of frequent Confession, introduced by the Church under the guidance of the Holy Spirit.’
Pope St John XXIII
